People growing up and changing?

My sister got engaged.... Its exciting and fun I guess but shes wanting to do things a lot with other people and she doesnt realize shes hurting people feelings when she says she doesnt want their help. And she told my grandma she didnt want our little sister in her wedding because she wouldnt stand still she will be 10 years old shes the same age as she was when she stood in our dads wedding! So I told her I didnt want to be in it if she didnt want our little sister in her wedding. She said well i havent made up my mind yet but you were It was going to be one of her good friends a couple of other friends and then me. Her sister on the end. And i had her as my maid of honor in my wedding... I said ok. Thats fine she said well we dont always get along and me and so and so get along so i asked her. I said thats fine. Im her older sister. I had told my dad i was going to go with her at tax time and buy her wedding dress. Because i was her older sister and her matron of honor and i felt kinda motherly over her. But not now... I dont want to do her hair. I dont want to plan a shower. I dont want to go. She hates our little sister so bad because she was born and she took her old room. She wants that old room back so bad! She will tell you she hates her for being born! Because she took her room. My sister has a major middle child problem. And for her to hate our sister so much that she doesnt want her in her wedding is so mind boggling to me that i cant even grasp the whole thing. I had a big come to jesus with her! I said im not going to be in your wedding period. You pick friends over family and then you exclude your own sister! She said well they asked first... i didnt have no friends ask to be in my wedding! I just can not even get over that. Now shes saying she doesnt know who shes gonna have in it. And she might have our sister... That breaks my heart. Your siblings is your siblings! final! even if i was arguing with them if they needed me for ANYTHING i would be there for them. I am beyond disappointed and heart broken that she could think like this... I told her too. she said well everyone is telling me who should and shouldnt be in my wedding and where would be a nice place and people keep telling me ideas and want to help and i dont want their help... I said they only want the best and to help you. I made my sister my maid of honor because she was my sister i didnt ask any of my friends! Honestly i didnt care My baby had died a month before my wedding. I didnt care if i got married or not. My sister didnt plan me a shower or help me pick out anything or get me a gift or anything. And i never said one word. Til now. i told her how sucky of a job she did as my MOH. And i wished now that shes acting that way towards her sisters that i had of asked someone else... But for her to break the heart of a child thats her sister! is beyond me... Shes so childish herself i guess she cant help it. its sad.

Suspended from work? Maybe....

Yeah it happened... So what? LOL 

Well it all started when this girl hadnt been written up since she had been there because our manager has no back bone at all. She is the type of worker who comes to work 20 mins later shes like I have a migraine so shes sitting on the stoop lookin like a crack head smokin a cigg! And wearin her big black shades! Then 30 mins after she gets there shes like I gotta go I cant work with this head ache! So she would just straight walk outta the shop! And leave! So guess whos gotta work til from 10-9pm! ME and she was messy! She would do nothing but eat saltine crackers all over the shop! And leave crumbs everywhere you would always see piss ants carrying off crumbs like thanks for the food! And then I would get asked to clean up her nasty crumbs and clean down her station and put her hairy clippers away and clean her dirty combs! So I had spent the entire previous day cleaning combs and brushes because people just throw them in the disinfectant without washing them first and they are sitting in the drawers full of hair. Yeah makes you want to go get your hair done right? And  cleaning out stations and scrubbing down messes that other people were just to lazy to do before they left. So she had left her dirty hairy clippers at a station 3 days prior. Our big boss had come into the salon and asked whos nasty clippers are these? I said idk. So i have to clean them up! Again! So the store manager hides them she said well we will find out whos they are! I knew they were hers! Well she comes waltzin in the shop like idk what happened to my clippers but i need them! Blah Blah Blah! 

So i told her where they were but i said you need to start cleaning up your stuff Im tired of always having to clean up after you! Im not your maid! She said I know how to do my job dont start with me I got a migraine! (shes a known pill popper she even has asked customers for pills (y is she still employed!)) (So she was prob coming off of a high) So i told her dont be a bitch to me! Clean your shit period! IDC! what is wrong with you im not cleaning your stuff no more i will throw it in the dumpster! So she picks up her clippers and says im gonna smash in your teeth and bust you in your head say it again. I said what bitch? Yeah your a bitch clean your shit. She runs her mouth the other girl is freaking and she said no dont hit Kellie she will kill you! I said she isnt going to hit me she would have already You dont give people warnings. So i clocked out and i opened the door and told her she could bring her white trash outside if she wanted to act like we were in the trailer park! And i would stomp her old ass in the parking lot! So she starts crying and calls the manager. because she knew i was gonna stomp a mud hole in her! And they called the owner, she got fired and i got suspended. AND THEN! they gave me my shifts back! I was like mother fuckers! you just want a paper saying i got suspended! It was some shit! They told me even if people are trailer trash bitches i cant call them that! I have to be professional i said i think i did act really professional when I didnt get up and snatch her by her hair and drag her outside if she woulda hit me with her clippers i would have had to stomp her ass and hurt her. But as soon as i stood up she ran in the back and locked the door... SMH! Trashy!!! I swear. But that was the first time i have ever been disciplined at work! The owner and area manager were very shocked! I said well im going to stand up for myself! and if she had been fired a long time ago i wouldnt have had a altercation with her. Plus my grandpa had died and that was on the day of his funeral! And i wasnt allowed off for it And had to work! And the handbook says im allowed 3 days off. So yeah that making me work thing back fired on them. And my manager got in trouble for making me work while i was grieving because she had the day off and i offered to switch with her! So yeah try to take me down bitch! Ill sink the whole damn boat! And the same day i got a job offer from sports clips... still debating that offer!

A year later! What next?

Almost one year ago I gave birth to the most beautiful baby girl anyone could ever ask for! NOW! She is almost one year old and I do not know how to feel about that! I have watched this amazing little person grow from being a 10.2 pound baby at birth to a 24 pound toddler! This past year has been so life changing for the better! I love her so much! I wake up in the mornings with a smile because shes there to greet me and shes so happy to see  me! I really am having a hard time dealing with her growing up! I dont remember those baby days as easily now. I really honest to God feel like i need medication because I have done nothing but be emotional ALL the time! Thinking about her growing up and not wanting to be my little girl one day about does me in! But I am planning her a wonderful birthday surprise! Not that she knows what that is yet but Im enjoying myself! Happy early birthday to my Sweet Allison Rose... I would not trade anything in the world for you or anyway you are! You are my pride and joy!!! I love you forever!